Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Smack Down the "Runway"

Occasionally people tell me I look like a model. Don’t take my word for it go see for yourself. (I'll pay you tomorrow, Amber) I know, ain’t flattery grand! Excuse me while I climb aboard this trains bound for the vanity land. I thought this year’s apple picking rendezvous was the perfect time to perfect my mad modeling skills.

Don’t hate. I know, “You think I’m gorgeous, you think I’m sexy, you want to hug me, you want to squeeze me into America’s next top model.” I tell you folks, it’s talent. With these moves the rotting carrots in the fridge and the empty ice cream cartons won’t be an issue.

Hahhhhhhhhaaaaaaaa Bah Humbug!
They’d take away my french fries and give me carrot sticks and they’d pour out my coffee and force me to whiten my teeth. They’d make me go to the gym to work out instead of for the cute boys and free tv. Those skinny, hungry broads would probably have a cat fight with me and poke my eye out with a curling iron. And then they’d blow up my hair like a ponies tail put in an electric socket and they’d dress me like Dracula and tell me to roll over like an exclamation point. Then they’d put me in a line and they’d judge me and tell me I was fat and that I was an ugly Dracula. And I’d cry and run off the show straight for the Top Chef and stuff my starved belly back to happy then I’d go down to Rodeo Drive and win a date with Tad Hamilton.  I'd be forced to blog about it for the rest of my life and you'd be so sick of me.......you'd click your heels and go home.

So now that you know how well I take a compliment and how good I look in vainty, which photo should i use for my portfolio?


  1. Could you be any cuter, Miz Elizabeth? I think not.

    Oh...and you're welcome.

  2. I'd go with the 2nd photo.....it's very dramatic.

    Seriously, I LOVE your outfit....that coat...those boots. Very cute.

  3. I remember one time at Dayspring, you had on these white pants and a navy/white striped sweater..sailor-ish..and I remember telling you that you needed to go show Tyra your stuff on Am. Next Top Model...

    You are beautiful..inside and out!



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